Why we Foster
So to start way at the beginning… growing up my Mom & I had an in-home daycare and we also were licensed to babysit for a foster mom in our church. Later I taught at a private school, then worked in a deaf school. I’ve always loved working with kids. Met my hubby and while we were dating we volunteered a week at New Horizons Ministries in Colorado and before we left for home we knew we would love to be involved in a mission like that. My hubby also has a huge heart for kids, so we definitely knew we wanted a big family 🙂 We got married in 2012 and we would pray for God to lead us and show us if He would have us go to CO, but really, just to lead us where He wanted us to go. (yeah, honestly it was more of a casual prayer in the beginning, as much as I hate to admit it, but it did keep churning a longing deep within us). About a year in we thought we were ready to start a family. So we opened our hands and prayed and told God to do whatever He wanted to do with us and our journey of becoming a family.. Little did we know what we had signed up for. In those next 2 years, pregnancy didn’t happen like we though it would & we cried out to God for direction. We just really thought maybe this was going to be our ticket to be able to pursue serving kids & moving to Colorado. But nothing seemed to give and we didn’t have peace or clear direction in pursuing it.
I think so many people look at our story and think, Oh they love & are great with kids and are perfect for foster care! Or, that we merely pursued foster care because we weren’t getting pregnant. But here’s the honest truth. We had a heart for kids and felt a calling on our life, but we weren’t willing to take an unabandoned look at it or really listen. And basically it was because in our minds, we “knew what we wanted”. …… Until our comfort-zone was stripped away. Slowly layers were being peeled away. Looking back, I think it’s really sad, especially when I hear people say comments referring to the same in their lives..”oh I have such a heart for these kids, but I don’t know if it’ll ever happen“–it’s up to you whether you want to pass off the ‘heart’ that God has placed in you or really listen and be obedient to God’s call.
Ok back to our story; we talked about doing foster care, adopting, etc…. But we were never on the same page at the same time with each other and in peace before God, with pursuing any of those paths. We really struggled to be honest with ourselves and be careful to not make an emotional decision of doing any of these just to fill our home with kids.. [if that’s you, don’t feel bad, I think we just sensed a deeper call on our life.] In the beginning of 2015 we attended a spiritual conference & came home knowing without a shadow of a doubt what we were supposed to do. I really don’t know how to put it in words. BUT God. At the same time, unaware of what the other was hearing, God was asking us to share our rich inheritance -that He blessed us with- with those that don’t have anything. That day He asked us to open our home for His children & we weighed the cost & said Yes. We’re realizing more & more…. He just wants our obedience. That’s it. [“Because no matter how glorious something may ‘appear’ the true blessing is in obedience when not all is glorious.“] Within a week we were signed up for PATH classes, training to become foster parents {it was really beneficial training & we also learned that the words ‘Resource’ and ‘Foster’ are interchangeable, and I think its especially great to use with older kids where the word foster is like a stigma}. Within 3 months we were fully licensed and 5 days later we welcomed our first child into our home.
And we’ve not been the same since.. We’ve realized a few things. I’ve heard people say that through their miscarriage they gained a huge heart for adoption. For us, we had a heart for foster-care, but through our season of not becoming pregnant, it caused us to tap into our huge heart for kids, which right now is in foster-care and we’re totally open to adoption too. I realize that God gives you something hard to make something beautiful. Going through infertility and now doing foster-care, we are gaining an even huger heart for kids, and I’m really excited at the possibilities of where it may lead us.
One more thing, so many times I get cliche comments and I think all you foster moms out there know what I’m talking about, so I don’t want to mention them all and make those people feel bad. However there is one sentiment that I feel is dangerous that I would like to address; “You were made just for that. God gave you a heart for this. God built you perfect for this work.” I’m sorry, but I wasn’t perfect, or had it all together when I entered this sphere. I realize that God in obvious ways was preparing my heart and I had perfect exposure and fit ‘the criteria’ well, but it concerns me when that is all that people look at. Sometimes people use those as excuses, saying, “Oh I didn’t always have a heart for it. I didn’t grow up with any exposure or experience to it“. (whatever it is that God may be asking of you.) BUT. As you could see earlier, even though we had a heart for kids, what mattered was our obedience. Most of my actual ‘training and life lessons and glorifying God’ weren’t actually happening until I was in the thick of it. There is peace, & God is glorified when you are right where He wants you. If God is asking you to do something, He wants your obedience. He will give you Grace. He will give you a ‘heart for it’. You have Everything you need! I don’t think he waits to qualify you until you are called, unlike that popular saying. Obviously with Jesus, ‘You are qualified for it if He called you to it’.
This isn’t exactly how I would have pictured our story, it’s not a ‘fairy-tale’, but no matter what it looks like at the time, obedience makes it beautiful in the end! AND I am so happy that it IS our story.. & btw this is #fostercareawarenessmonth –I would love to share any info or answer questions with anyone that would love to make a difference in the life of a child or a foster family. Any questions? Comment below, maybe it’ll give me inspiration for topics to write about this month.. 😉
If you enjoyed this post and would like to connect on a more personal level, please connect with me. Or if you need prayer, I would love to be in touch with you! Email me at capturingjewels@gmail.com -Follow me on Facebook or on Instagram. To follow along on our journey and not miss any posts, subscribe to the blog [top right corner] or follow my blog Facebook page, not just my personal one. ?
